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Fight

We go through things in life when we may push people we love away, in order to cope and deal with the pain inside. We get angry at someone when it’s not even them we are angry at. Or we hold it all in, thinking this is best. When it’s not. This is….the fight. The fight we have for love, for friendships, our kids, our future, our challenges….our life. We struggle with this fight not knowing how it will turn out. But yet, we fight for our belief, our love, our goal, our safety, our happy ending.

We fight battles some may not see or understand. Like people who are coping with anxiety, or mental illness. With grief with loss of a loved one or pet. With the feeling of emptiness because he or she misses their children, whom they might not get to see anymore. We fight battles to save someone from drowning themselves in alcohol, or drugging themselves to death. The pain carry inside. And fighting….to get through the day, the night, the time they have on Earth.

We don’t understand everyone’s battles unless we have gone through it or similarities. And yet sometimes, we stand with them, ready to fight alongside with them. And love the just the same.

When someone is pushing you away or tries to hide their pain, they are trying to fight their inner battles alone. But, being supportive and showing you are not going anywhere might be just what they need at that time. Be patient, not everyone heals as fast or as long as you. Hear their pain when they stay in silence, or when they speak whatever little they may do. They might push you you away in defense to protect their heartache, so give them space. Give them the time to heal, don’t push for them to speak out or rush their healing process. This will only prolong it. Or end up in loss.

There is a quote I came across not long ago….”She was never afraid of his darkness or the demons who danced in his eyes. He thought no one could ever love him if he revealed what lurks inside. He always knew he was different, how could anyone understand? But she was never afraid of his darkness or the beast within the man.” – Author unknown. I finally understood it. I know of a man like this. He was scared to show this side of him, not wanting to expose his inner demons. For knowing that it would scare me. He still has this fear. But….what he doesn’t know, is that those inner demons; I’ve known of, for far too long. I saw them in him a long time ago. And after years has past by, I am still there. Fighting secretly alongside him. Emphatically feeling his pain, his angry, his sadness, his frustration, his pain…..his fight he has battled for many years. All the while, no matter how many times he pushed me away, he fought with me, he tried to shut me out, I stood there. Waiting. Waiting for his message, his phone call, his willingness to open up and let me in more. And still standing there, never afraid of his darkness, his beast inside him. For I love him just the same. And will never leave him. I was ready to fight for love, for our friendship. For anything that came in my path. And learnt along the way, that I could fight, by not pushing him. By just being there. And not give up. This has been one of my strongest attributes I’ve ever had. I don’t give up that easily, and never without a fight.

We fight the pain or darkness we carry inside, or fight to survive from the toxicity we face in our lives. But nevertheless, always….ready to fight, for whatever lies ahead.

In light and love always,

Amanda

 

 

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